Never Be Replaced

I don't know what to do and I don't know what to think.. Can you please prove me wrong.. I don't expect that I would see that ring again and I never ever thought that you would wear that again.. I don't want to hope that you still love me, but how can I.. If you give chances so secretly and unexpectedly..

That ring, I know that ring.. It was my gift when we celebrate your birthday, a month before our second anniversary. I'm so happy to see that ring on your finger again..

What can I do.. I don't know how to.. You gave me surprises, and I never thought of that..
Damn! What is this I am feeling? What is this I'm thinking? Can you please.. please.. please..

The Window

Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour a day to drain the fluids from his lungs. His bed was next to the room's only window. The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back.

The men talked for hours on end. They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation. And every afternoon when the man in the bed next to the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window.

The man in the other bed would live for those one-hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the outside world. The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake, the man had said. Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats. Lovers walked arm in arm amid flowers of every color of the rainbow. Grand old trees graced the landscape, and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance. As the man by the window described all this in exquisite detail, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine the picturesque scene.

One warm afternoon the man by the window described a parade passing by. Although the other man could not hear the band, he could see it in his mind's eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words. Unexpectedly, an alien thought entered his head: Why should hehave all the pleasure of seeing everything while I never get to see anything? It didn't seem fair. As the thought fermented, the man felt ashamed at first. But as the days passed and he missed seeing more sights, his envy eroded into resentment and soon turned him sour. He began to brood and found himself unable to sleep. He should be by that window - and that thought now controlled his life.

Late one night, as he lay staring at the ceiling, the man by the window began to cough. He was choking on the fluid in his lungs. The other man watched in the dimly lit room as the struggling man by the window groped for the button to call for help. Listening from across the room, he never moved, never pushed his own button which would have brought the nurse running. In less than five minutes, the coughing and choking stopped, along with the sound of breathing. Now, there was only silence--deathly silence.

The following morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths. When she found the lifeless body of the man by the window, she was saddened and called the hospital attendant to take it away--no words, no fuss. As soon as it seemed appropriate, the man asked if he could be moved next to the window. The nurse was happy to make the switch and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone.

Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look. Finally, he would have the joy of seeing it all himself. He strained to slowly turn to look out the window beside the bed. It faced a blank wall.

I just can't sleep, waiting for 12 midnight.. Can't hardly take away those thoughts making me so sad.. I always remember those mem'ries with her, and together with that those words coming from my friends to let it go. For sometime, I really want to forget it but my problem is I can't.. Maybe I just need time..
Nothing happens so very important today. I'm just at home the whole day. Woke up 1:00 in the afternoon, ate my very late brunch, watched old movies with my dad, browse the net for some music updates, download some songs and 'til it came dark. Damn Life! So very Boring!

Before I forget, that one! I received message from her again, making me smile but also making me sad again. Sometimes I asked myself, why do such persons like her exists? who only values you when she needs you, who only says I need you when actually they need only your help, who actually says loved you, but in fact screwed you...! She destroyed me actually, all I've worked hard for, all my dreams, I gave it up for her, but it ended NOTHING!.. Someday you'll see how much important am I and someday you'll regret for not being with me..

(haha.. drama.. 'yung isang taong makakabasa nito.. naku.. subukan mo mang-asar.. 'yung comment ko wala pa.. tapos na birthday ko wala pa din.. hahay)


forget and remember... T-T

Forgot the times she walked by,

forget the times she made you cry,

forget the times she spoke your name,

remember now you're not the same,

forget the times she held your hand,

forget the sweet things if you can,

forget the times and don't pretend,

remember now she's just your friend..


i wanna shout iloveyou….

Starting my run in the middle of town,
bright sunlight at my back,
as always, you tapped my shoulder
I’m so enthralled by you
yet for reasons
unknown your arm won’t be linked to mine.
Before I realized it, you stole my gaze, and it began.
I won’t let you go. I
won’t have any doubts.
I’m Crazy for you.
I want to shout "I love you."
Let’s try to change tomorrow.
I want to smash this freezing moment in time.
I want to shout "I love you."
Let’s be brave and take a step forward.
I want you to receive these warm emotions.
On the noisy floor, across from me at the crowded table,
I’m lost in your casual glance.
It feels like I’m in love with you,
yet it’s like I’m being toyed with.
I can’t lie to my soaring hearbeat anymore.
Let’s leave everything behind.
I want to find the words to melt your heart.
I won’t let you leave me tonight.
Let’s end the days we don’t get past just gazing at eachother
I wanna cry for you ….